Lately my mind has been racing in about twenty different directions. Let's see if I can name them all for you:
Work (x3- One for each job),
Class,
Family (x6- One for each member of my immediate family and one for each side of extended family), Exercise,
Missionary Kids Ministries,
Church,
Future career paths (x4- One for each significantly different possibility),
Youth,
Friends,
Music,
Oh and maybe thinking about things of a spiritual nature (that's not a big deal though, right?).
There, I think I reached my twenty, and I could list a whole bunch more.
Still, my mind racing in a million (that's more accurate than twenty probably) different directions is nothing to be upset about. Sure, I'm torn between a lot of different commitments, people, and places, but they are all good things. What becomes difficult is when I get frustrated at not knowing what is coming next. The truth is that I don't know what is next. There are so many things I'm interested in doing and places I want to go that it seems impossible to commit to any one of them. Each possibility has too many pros and cons to make a list and just compare them side by side.
The truth is that I'm excited for the future. I'm excited to find out where I am going to go, what my job will be, who I will marry (Lord-willing!), who I will be in community with, and who God will change me to be. I know that God can change the world through me. I don't have huge dreams or aspirations to change the WHOLE world, but I know that I can change the world around me. I can change my world and that of those people closest to me. What's important is staying grounded. Developing a routine and sticking to it. Setting goals for myself and attaining them. Reaching my hand out to the world (and the people in it) around me and treating them with grace, patience, humility, and respect. That's something I can focus on for now. Not that dreaming is bad. Dreaming is good, but it's important not to get stuck in worrying about or over-planning the future.
Proverbs 19 says "Many are the plans a person makes, but the purpose of the Lord prevails." So here I am. I will plan, because that is inevitable. But I will rest in the grace of God knowing that his purpose for me will prevail in the end. What a comforting thought!
Hi Beth, you are so ahead of where I was at your age. It's so cool that you recognize already that your plans are not necessarily where you will end up. I've been reading a really good book over the weekend. It's called TrueFaced by Bill Thrall, Bruce McNicol, and John Lynch. It's awesome! So far.
ReplyDeleteOh I've heard of that. My boss's classes read it :) Maybe I'll borrow it from him!
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